I know this is relatable - our house is a disaster. It's so difficult to stop clutter from stressing me out 24/7.
In the current in-between stage, where we don't know if we'll be having another baby, our house is full of hand-me-downs (clothes, furniture, toys, carseats, etc.). We are also bedsharing, and have converted our bed to a floor bed, which means we have a king-sized bed frame taking up our basement, and had to find a new home for all the stuff that used to be under our bed, and for the duvet that we can't use because it's too fluffy. I also still have my pregnancy pillow in case I get pregnant again, even though there probably won't be room for it with bedsharing.
Like most families, we already have our fair share of clutter, in the form of sentimental items, holiday decorations, camping equipment, craft supplies, toys, electronics, various collections, etc. Our house is a perfectly reasonable size for a family of up to four people, but we just have too much stuff. I have always been extremely against paying to store our stuff, as it is literally throwing money away as the stuff just gets all dirty and dilapidated. I would much rather declutter and make more room in our house.
The challenge is that my husband and I are both too sentimental about objects from our childhood.
Inside my mind, there is an eternal struggle between the minimalist and hoarder versions of myself.
I go through times where I just want to get rid of everything, but then I try to go through things, and end up keeping everything.
I also have the struggle of digital clutter, which has also gotten worse since I had my baby, because I now have way more photos than I ever had before (I used to think I took a ton of pictures of my cat, but it was nothing compared to when my baby arrived). The digital clutter is even more stressful somedays, when I try to figure out what I'm going to do about it, and I'm constantly getting emails and notifications about running out of space. I have an external hard drive, but I love the convenience of cloud storage, and don't want to have to pay to add more space.
Then there is the issue of clothing.
Pre-pregnancy, pregnancy, postpartum, and breastfeeding all have their own separate wardrobes.
I moved most of my pre-baby clothes to bags on my closet floor for the time-being, and mostly everything that's still hanging or on the closet shelves is either nursing clothes or bottoms that fit my postpartum body. I'll need to do more closet swaps when I stop breastfeeding, if I get pregnant again, etc.
I try to find places for everything where it is mostly out of sight, then live by the phrase "out of sight, out of mind".
The problem mainly arises when I need to find something, find a place for something, or interact with the cluttered spaces. I am quite an organized person, but the more things there are, the harder it is to keep up an organized system.
If we do have another baby in the future, that will mean we'll be able to use and eventually get rid of the retained baby things, but it will also create new problems by likely taking away our guest room, where we store things under the bed, on a shelf, and in the closet. I don't think the rooms are big enough that the kids could share - our baby's room is already pretty full.
Clutter always feels like such an insurmountable problem, so I just try not to think about it very much.
I'm sure many other Moms, and women in general, can relate. I find that most men seem immune to the stress of clutter, because they don't think of it as a problem that they need to solve. It's part of the invisible load of motherhood.
It's important that we give ourselves grace and acknowledge that there is only so much that can be done about it.
The clutter even turns receiving gifts into a struggle, because if the gift is more stuff, I just wonder where I'll be able to put it, which takes away from the enjoyment. I always try to get people useful gifts, or things they actually want, instead of more stuff they probably don't need. I always have a wish list in case anyone wants to get me a gift, so that it can be something that I specifically need or want (and I try to put useful things on it).
I feel like clutter is mainly a problem for people of a specific income, because if we had more money, we wouldn't hold onto so many things for the possibility that we'll use them again someday (we'd just buy things again if that happened), or we would just pay to store everything, and not care about how much it costs (or have a bigger house with more storage). Being frugal tends to go hand in hand with keeping too much stuff.
I try to focus on changing my mindset, rather than the seemingly impossible challenge of tackling the clutter.
I also plan to try very hard to avoid my daughter having the same problem - I have plans to teach her to donate her toys and things that she doesn't use anymore, and to choose only a few pieces of art/schoolwork to keep each year, and we can scan/take pictures of the ones we don't keep. I want her to focus more on memories, and less on things, just as I try to do.
It's important to try to focus on living in the moment, and not dwell on these challenging aspects of life.
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